"Long Nail Man" Strikes Again

There are many occasions when a picture is truly worth a thousand words.
However, there are other occasions when taking a picture would be entirely inappropriate and thus, a thousand words will have to do.

I am not a superficial person...I try to reserve judgment, appreciate different views and lifestyles, and accept people for who they are. However, there are few things in the world that I find more disgusting than a man with gross fingernails and toenails...and that is where I draw the line.

My current job as a receptionist in a bank corporate headquarters exposes me to a wide variety of people, along with their peculiar habits, patterns, and personalities. There is a man who comes in every day to drop of "cash items" (I still don't know what this means) from the Federal Reserve Bank. Every day this man parks his gold station wagon in one of the 3 parking spots in the entire lot that do not belong to our company. He climbs out of his car and walks in wearing his usual attire (and when I say usual, I mean daily, with no variation whatsoever): his long blond greasy hair pulled back into a bun, a very dirty white (I think..) t-shirt under an open flannel shirt, grubby black sweatpants with elastic at the ankles, and old black sneakers. If it is raining or snowing, he wears a wicker-like straw fedora hat tipped forward like a cowboy walking into a saloon. Unfortunately for him, his massive belly, bright pink pig-like facial features, sweats, and sneakers sans spurs don't exactly contribute to the smooth Texas Ranger look. I digress.

As this man hands me his daily gift and pushes a clipboard into my hand to sign, I can't help but stare at his hands. At the tips are the most disgusting nails I have seen outside of the Guinness Book of World Records: very long, thick, yellow, and pointy like 10 little daggers; that alone is enough to test my stomach's resiliency, but atop these fungal weapons is a layer of clear nail polish, which is curious for obvious reasons.

I ask myself each morning what would possess a man to grow out his fingernails so long and then paint them. I wonder what he uses them for...Does he use them to mine for gold in his large swine-like nostrils? Does he pick the locks to his car when he loses his keys? Does he use them to ward off attackers?

I have yet to arrive at an answer. The mystery lives on.